I have periods where I enjoy being on Facebook and other periods where it’s been a terror. There’s a lot of things I like to see, a lot of people whose updates I also enjoy seeing. Then there are those folks whose stuff gets on my nerve, or posts and sites that have content that I’m just not up for seeing all that often.
I’ve previously talked about a plugin called FB Purity which can eliminate a lot of stuff. It works very well, but it can’t block everything. As a matter of fact, there’s no way any of us can block everything; but we can make changes you probably didn’t know about, that I really hadn’t explored until last week, and that’s what I’m going to talk about today because, after I made these changes, my stream has drastically improved.
First, did you know that you can stay friends with someone without having to see everything they put up? That can be valuable because you might want to pick when you want to see things for these folk as opposed to having it jump in your feed and throw your mind off. Did you also know that you can decide who sees your posts, in case you have some of those folk who will pop in and say things on something you post that might upset you?
What I’m about to share is different than what my buddy Holly shared in November as it regards privacy, on which she did two posts about. This might take you some time depending on how many friends you have, but trust me it’s worth it. By the way, the images will be in order but because of size they may not necessarily match up with each step, so I’ll number them.
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1. The first thing you have to do is find your friends list. You begin by clicking on your profile name at the top left of your main Facebook page (your colors are going to be different than mine because of FB Purity).
2. Click on the link that says Friends, which should be the 3rd one over. You see I have 591 friends; this is why it takes a while, though you don’t have to click on every person you come to.
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3. You will see pictures of the people who you’ve friended on Facebook. I have no idea how it determines what order the names come up in but that’s not a big deal. What I want you to see are a couple of things out of the image I’m sharing.
The first is that everyone here shows up as a friend. That part doesn’t actually mean anything; it’s what’s next to them that tells you what’s going on. People with a check mark next to their names means they’re part of my general friends list. I might see what they have to share in my stream, and they can see what I share if I happen to pop up for them. The people with stars means I’ve added them to a Facebook created category called Close Friends. These are people I know intimately in some way, hung out with, not just people I’ve met.
4. Now it’s time for some work. I’m highlighting my buddy Mel here, who I just love (everyone loves Mel lol). At the very top you see I’ve clicked Get Notifications. This means that if I’m looking at Top Stories instead of Most Recent, her posts, as well as others who I’ve categorized like this, will show up first in my stream. You also see the check next to Close Friends, which is why there’s a star next to her name if you’d seen her name in the friends I selected.
If I uncheck Get Notifications, I wouldn’t see her posts until I’d seen everyone else’s. If close friends isn’t checked, then she’s move further down the list.
The biggie is Acquaintances; it sets everything else up that you might want to do. If you click that, it gives you the ability to not only not have to see anything they post, but they can’t see what you post either if you make one more change on your site, which now goes back to what Holly shares with us as it regards privacy. If you don’t go to privacy, you at least protect your posts from being seen by others, so if you want to stop there then you’re good.
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5. If you want more control over who sees your stuff, you go to the top far right, click on the arrow, and then go down to settings. When it opens the menu you’ll see Privacy on the far left. Click on that and it’ll open this menu.
These are my privacy settings. By selecting Friends except acquaintances, from this point on people won’t see anything that I post as an original… for the most part. This only works with content; it seems that if you share images they’re still being seen by everyone, but I’m not so selective there. In this area you have lots of options you can select to make them your default settings. I say it that way because every once in a while you might have something you want everyone to see, and Facebook always gives you the option of overriding your default to either share with more people or be more selective, like if I only wanted the people I designate as a close friend to see something.
I have to admit that since doing that my stream has improved dramatically. I’m now seeing people I hadn’t seen in the longest time, and the stuff they’re sharing is way less intrusive and upsetting than what my norm had been. Those I’ve made acquaintances will never know they’ve been designated as such because Facebook is all over the place, so it’ll look like a natural selection thing by them.
How’s that for a tutorial at the beginning of the year? If you decide to try it let me know how things work out for you.
I’m giving serious thought to deactivating/deleting my Facebook account entirely.
They are impossible to deal with (there are no human beings to communicate with, and their “rulings” on various things appear to be largely arbitrary, depending on who handles the report or trouble ticket);
They are unresponsive;
They are inordinately proud of themselves and refuse to admit that their new “security measures” are fatally flawed;
They are blatantly and unrepentantly manipulative;
They have way too much information about us and way too much power (if we let them have it) – we complacently accept their privacy suck in return for the company of our friends;
I could go on. But I’m about over them. I’m still thinking about it, as they hold the login keys to so many things, these days, that it would be a hassle. Still… thinking about it.
What you’re going through is a reason I didn’t sign up with a lot of other sites. The numbers and being able to connect with friends & family there is why I stay, and why I put the time in sculpting my feed. I have to say that if I were going through what you’re going through I’d probably be giving it the same consideration; that’s irksome as heck!
Hi Mitch,
When I first start coaching someone to grow their online business, I often start out by asking people what they do routinely and then, asking them to think seriously about what they can subtract from the list. Usually, they think that moving forward means they’ve got to add things. Usually, just the opposite.
In order to be focused, you’ve got to tailor things. Your Facebook is one of those important things to streamline and cut down to size so it is more meaningful and focused. I didn’t even know most of these things you talked about, so I thank you for helping me to do a bit of trimming down on my Facebook feed.
-Donna
Glad to be of assistance Donna. You’re right though, cutting out certain things is actually a way of pushing forward, removing a lot of the clutter. I keep reducing mine, but then I sometimes seem to add more. My Facebook feed is much nicer, but I might have to do a few more things for a bit more peace of mind.
I love Facebook only as a content promoter. Facebook is an essential social marketing tool. But, at times I Feel Facebook is serious time waster and it’s one of the most addictive site. Every time I log into Facebook, I end up wasting minimum 1/2 – 1 hour. What I am doing there.. just nothing with my valuable time.
Seriously I don’t like facebook if this affects.
Uttam, all of social media isn’t for making money or marketing oneself; at least that’s how I feel. Some of it has to be for fun or networking; otherwise, it’s just another thing to irritate us. For me overall, Facebook is entertainment. Without my business page, I could have a pretty good time there, which is why I’m only talking about the potential of ending my business page there, not leaving. If you’re wasting time there then it probably means you’re having fun; think of that as a positive, unless it’s impeding other things you need to be doing.
Hi, Mitch
I joined Facebook about 2 years ago, it gets to a point of overwhelming. Your post just came in at right time. I will follow some of the steps to delete the “junks” which are really distraction.
– Stella Chiu
Good deal Stella. It’s made things nice for me, and I’ve even gone a little bit further to remove a few more things that get my blood boiling… I don’t need that on a daily basis. I wish you luck with it.
Hi Mitch 🙂
I agree that sometimes being on Facebook can be really annoying when you browse News Feed, especially if your friends list is huge and there are tons of people who are just not your type, boring and wasting your FB space xD
However I see you didn’t mention “unfollow” option. Do you know about it?
You don’t need to actually unfriend someone (In some cases it turns being rude move), but you can unfollow from all of their posts and it won’t show you anything from them on your News Feed, but you’ll stay friends.
I’ve done this to tons of mine list and now I’m more satisfied to what shows up, instead of posts which don’t interests me.
Thanks for writing! 😉
Regards,
-Adam
Hi Adam, and welcome to the blog. You’re right, I didn’t talk about unfollow, which I could have but I didn’t want to distract from where I was going here. The thing with unfollow is that you have to go to every individual person’s profile whereas this way you can go through lots of folks at one time. True, it’s a bit more thorough but some might find the time component more than they want to deal with… heck, even what I’ve showed here will take time for very popular people. lol Very good suggestion though for those folks who you really, REALLY never want to see anything from. 🙂
A lot of good tips there Mitch. The way I cleaned up my Facebook stream? I nuked 70% of my so-called friends off my list. The less than 200 that remain are people I truly am interested in. I scrolled through my list and if I had to think about who that person was or how I knew them they are gone.
That cleared up a lot of clutter.
You can do that Troy. I’ve thought about it but I’m not quite ready to cut off my nose to spite my face, if you know what I mean. I’m working on my online influence and audience, so it’s important enough for me to be connected to certain people I never interact with at this time. That is, as long as they’re not being irritating. 🙂
Well, as soon as I read your post I made use of your shared knowledge. I knew some things about “Unfollowing”, etc. but this opened an entirely new world. I normally send a nice note and refuse to “friend” people who are on the periphery because I don’t use Facebook for anything other than personal.
And I truly see its value in staying connected. I have lost three sisters and would have lost track of their children and grandchildren were it not for Facebook. But some of them are a bit too much!
As usual, you are the font of knowledge on many things and I appreciate your willingness to share what you learn by your seemingly limitless curiosity.
xxoo
You’re the nicest thing! 🙂 I hope it brings you the comfort my efforts have brought me.
Hey Mitch,
This sounds like Edgerank on steroids.
I figured there was a way in how to control what other’s see and what you see. I have two Facebook accounts. One is strictly for my blogging friends, and the other is for friends and family.
But for friends and family, there are some posts that I like to control. Some are quite controversial. So far I’ve had one troll that wanted to argue, but usually I get people that would like to have regular conversation about. This is good to know just in case I get a bit irritated.
Thanks for the info Mitch! Have a great rest of the week!
No problem Sherm. Actually, in the family category there are some things I wish I wasn’t going to see but otherwise, I know I’ve chosen my friends well enough to make sure I’m seeing the types of things I want to see. It makes life a heck of a lot calmer, that’s for sure. And if I have to tweak it here and there, I can live with it.