Category Archives: Social Media

Who And How Do You Check Who To Connect With On Social Media?

Every day, those of us who are on social media get contacted by someone who wants to connect with us. Occasionally it’s us reaching out to someone else because we want to connect with them; kind of makes sense, right?

Arizona Flickr Meetup - Sam's Cafe

cobalt123 via Compfight

Most of the time I think the majority of people on some social media platforms add everyone who they know adds them. I think that because I see some of the numbers, and every once in a while look at some of the people that people I’m following are following; I hope you kept up with that. lol Often I see them connected to some folks who I’d consider either kind of shady or someone who’s never going to talk to them.
Continue reading Who And How Do You Check Who To Connect With On Social Media?

Done With Twitter

I just deleted my Twitter account. Since April 2008, when I signed onto Twitter, it was my favorite social media platform. True, there were some rough periods until I learned how to block people and terms, but for the most part it was wonderful.

closest to Twitter I’m going to get

What I find interesting is that I’ve written a lot of articles about Twitter, including this one from back in February, when my online social media life seemed to be the only thing I could relate to, 5 months after my mother had passed away. I’m surprised I didn’t write about my issues with the “new guy” possibly taking over Twitter, who I’d never heard of until maybe 4 years ago, and didn’t know anything about until last year, trying to back out, the Twitter board working hard to force him to buy it so they could all get rich quickly and then him finally buying it last Friday.
Continue reading Done With Twitter

Flipboard And How To Deal With Trolls

Just over 7 years ago, I introduced Flipboard to the visitors of this blog. In essence, it’s a news aggregator of stories from all over the world. It’s comprised of blog posts, newspaper and TV articles and videos on almost any topic imaginable.

physically bigger than trolls, but less dangerous 🙂

I’ve been a fan of Flipboard for all these years, and I’ve spent many nights and early mornings laying in bed flipping through all sorts of stories and such, although this year I’ve been going through a lot of political and societal issues in the United States. This has led me to learn more about Flipboard trolls, how to identify them, how to deal with them, and when to decide not to respond to them. That’s what I’m sharing with you today.
Continue reading Flipboard And How To Deal With Trolls

Try Not To Take Things Personally

Back in 2011, I wrote an article titled Taking Twitter Unfollows Too Personally. In that article, I talked about the strange reaction Chris Brogan received when he decided to unfollow all the people he’d been connected to, even though his reasoning was pretty just at the time. I was pretty amazed that all those people took it personally, even though he wrote about it to explain what he was doing.

Amnesty 20p books - 2

Caroline via Compfight

I’m going to admit that there are times when I struggle with not taking things personally. Sure, sometimes things do get personal, and in those instances you have to deal with it directly in some way. My favorite way, at least on social media, is to block people so I don’t have to bother with them anymore. It keeps me from saying something rude or from escalating things to an extreme.

Every once in a while I’ll stay calm and try to diffuse a situation, especially when I don’t really know the people I’m suddenly in conflict with. For instance, some years ago I got into a confrontation with a couple of millennials about something called Gamergate, which I really didn’t understand but had read a story about. I let them fuss and fume, called them on a couple of things they said, let them calm down and then had a nice conversation with them that ended well; they thanked me for listening to them and their side of things. I could have really gone off the deep end but in that case I felt it was better to see if I could find a way to talk to them instead.

I could bring things closer to home by talking about people I know. In at least 3 cases now I’ve asked people if I could interview them, only to see them do their first interviews with someone else. Each person started off with something like “I’d be too nervous to do an interview” or “I don’t know what I’d say”. Each of them I pursued more than a couple of years. Eventually… well, I already stated what happened.

Now, I could take it personally, wonder what I might have done, wondered if I wasn’t as compelling a person to be interviewed by them and sulked. Truthfully, I did sulk briefly each time I found out about it. Then I moved on; after all, I’ve interviewed a good number of people anyway, including one of the people I’ve talked about above, though I’ve struggled to get anyone to let me interview them in the longest time.

One of those things we all have to learn is that it’s not always about us. Sometimes it’s timing. Sometimes a person is having a bad day and decides to take it out on you. Last year I was having a conversation with a guy on Twitter about something and he said he was tired of being called a racist. I said I hadn’t called him one. He looked back through his stream, saw that I hadn’t (I hadn’t even come close lol), and apologized for his overreaction. His assumption that, based on what he was saying at the time, was that I was going to call him one, which was strange because I’d began the conversation by saying I agreed with him on something.

It’s hard enough in life to not take everything personally. It can be harder on social media, especially since we can’t always see someone’s facial expressions and, let’s face it, the English language is so goofy that you can look at a sentence and take it many different ways sometimes, depending on how you’re reading it at the time (proper punctuation might help; just a suggestion…). Even with emojis, there’s not enough to cover some of the emotions you wish you could share that aren’t over the top or doesn’t capture what you’re feeling at the time.

By the way, here’s something to know, at least on Twitter (which I’m presently still boycotting). Back in 2016 I was vehemently against the orange guy (I live in NY state; we knew a lot about him that people in other places didn’t), and supporting Hillary Clinton, who’d been a pretty good senate representative. I mentioned that only once on Twitter, and suddenly I was being swarmed by tons of responses with all mentioning the word “deplorable” (that was their talisman after Clinton mentioned it in a press conference).

Initially I was overwhelmed, before I remembered that Twitter allows you to block words and phrases you don’t want to see. Of course I blocked “deplorable”, then blocked the orange guy’s name; all messages immediately stopped, which proved to me that they were all bots (well, it’s possible that one or two weren’t, but the majority had to be). That’s one of those times where you definitely know it’s not personal, and shouldn’t ever get upset when something like that happens.

You can also block people on LinkedIn, Facebook and Instagram. The processes are different for each platform, but if you’re not being bombarded it’s a better way to go than trying to get the platform moderators to get some relief; if you’re reading this you probably already know that.

Enough of that mess. In any case, try your best not to take things personally if you’re being piled on for something you might have said that pretty much means nothing, block where you can, and see if it makes you feel better and helps you communicate better, online or in person. I feel compelled to add that if you actually said something that you should have known would inflame others… well… that’s on you, Boo! Otherwise, do what I do when I just can’t handle things in the moment; go to McDonald’s and buy a fish sandwich with small fries and a large drink; yeah! 🙂

The Proliferation Of “Fake” On Social Media

I remember years ago I read an article about the rise of fake Instagram accounts that follow those of us on the site, using the avatars of very pretty women. It’s pretty easy to tell these accounts are fake because… well, let’s face the fact that suddenly having a stunning woman with a foreign name following you is pretty suspect. Not only that, but you might get a message saying something like “hello dear” or “I’d love if you sent me a private message”.

nothing fake about this nutella pie!

Whereas that’s a nice pipe dream to believe, knowing my own personal history, I’d be an idiot not to doubt it; so would you. If you need to, you can click on the name and notice there’s only a few images along with a fake link to follow if you want more… trust me, never click on those links.
Continue reading The Proliferation Of “Fake” On Social Media