First, I hope you check out my Big RSS Subscriber Contest after reading this article.

Second, read this:

Dear Mitch Mitchell,

HelloMokona via Compfight

Brookstone has changed the way we assess our affiliate program’s profitability. Based on this analysis, we have found that sales from your website were resulting in a net loss to Brookstone, and we must cease our partnership effective immediately.

Well, thank you very much, Brookstone. Brookstone is one of my favorite retail stores, and I’ve spent a lot of money over the years buying a lot of things from there. I thought it would be kind of cool having them and their products as part of my affiliate domain, so to speak.

But here you go, being dropped because I’m giving them a net loss. Wait, hold on; how am I giving them a net loss? Sure, I haven’t made any sales, but all that means is that I haven’t earned them a net profit. I can’t lose anything for them; that makes no sense. Because I haven’t sold anything, they haven’t had to worry about collecting taxes from me because I’m in New York state.

I haven’t had to get product up front, then send it back to them, costing them in restocking fees (by the way, who agrees with me that restocking fees are the biggest scam and crock they’ve ever heard of; at least half the times your product is damaged, so they’re not restocking it to begin with). Frankly, even without making any sales, at the very least I’ve done nothing except promote them and some of their little quirky products.

Of course, Brookstone is having the same problems as many other retail stores, having posted a loss of 2% from the same period last year, the third quarter being the comparison period, but I find it hard to believe that Brookstone could be saving money by cutting someone like me, and other affiliate advertisers, who cost them absolutely nothing except a little bit of loyalty.

Well, that’s how it goes, I guess. I’ll probably still shop at their stores because, the sneaks, they always have those massage chairs in just the right place in the mall whenever I go there, which, lucky for me, is rare. I don’t like it, but, obviously, they’re not the first affiliate to drop me over the last 9 months.

They just came up with the lamest excuse.

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